The Wilderness Of My Heart
by Enna York
Summary: Kasia has spent the past four years surviving in the harsh wilderness on her own unsure of whether humanity has survived. Just when she's on the brink of giving up all hope Levi Ackerman and his squad members need her help in order to survive.


_It's been four years… four years since I've last seen a face that I'm not familiar with, a face that isn't of someone dead. Four years of isolation and desperation, four years of wondering what happened to humanity._

 _Maybe it hasn't even been four years, I didn't start counting the days until after over half of the first year happened. Maybe it's been more-but for all these years I haven't seen another human being… am I all that is left? Is this what humanity has come to? I look down from these treetops and what do I see but the monsters that wreaked havoc upon humanity yet look almost human._

Kasia sighed from her perch in the treetops, it had been a narrow escape today she was certain that _they_ were going to catch her, but they didn't. Thankfully she was already in the tree, she had seen several birds' nests and decided to climb up and collect eggs.

Then suddenly the earth began to shake beneath her, it rolled and bucked she clutched to the tree a fall from this height deadly. She didn't know how they had gotten so close without her noticing and she quite frankly didn't want to know, so Kasia went into survival mode pulling herself higher and higher into the tree.

Her tree cleared the ones around it allowing her to view over the sea of trees, she took in a deep breathe of the fresh clean air that smelt of all things she was familiar with like her favourite smells pine and rain. And despite the titans around she could hear the familiar sounds of the forest, birds singing and calling, the familiar chatter of chipmunks and squirrels.

She looked to the blue sky and tossed her head back smiling basking in the sun, her feet dangling hundreds of feet in the air above ground. She was home, Kasia hadn't seen the sky for so long now only the small patches that broke through the canopy that was constantly above her head.

She had forgotten what it looked like, she forgotten how blue it was and she saw clouds and … _the sun gods I haven't seen the sun for eons now_ She thought to herself. Suddenly she heard an unfamiliar bang echo across the forest. It wasn't natural she knew the sounds of the forest like her own voice-that was from another human.

She leapt to her feet eyes scanning over the forest, unless there was something visible or the sound occurred again even getting a rough idea let alone pinpointing the sound would be impossible. It sounded again _BANG_ Kasia twisted on her branch eyes narrowing in on the general direction, stretching out above the treeline was a trail of black smoke.

 _What is that idiot doing?_ She thought to herself heart racing, her feet urged her to push off and help whoever it was. Her heart pounding in her chest the sound like deafening drums in her ears and in fact she noticed herself shifting back and forth preparing the descent down the tree.

Her head however was remaining cool and calm, Kasia found her head was always like that in life or death situations she didn't ask for it to be but it was always cold and calculating it would tell her to always do the thing that would get _her_ out alive. _Don't be stupid, he's using a gun-that means he's being attacked either by a titan or other people and he just attracted every single titan in the forest to him._

She swallowed tears forming in her eyes feeling trapped, she wanted to save them so badly they were the first sign of humanity she had seen in four years. Yet saving them meant certain death, and Kasia had to stay alive she had to.

The trees under her shook as the titan that had once trapped her here moved on towards the sound of new prey, it was that sound the shaking of the tree underfoot that made her make up her mind. She nimbly descended down the tree leaping and jumping, when she saw the opportunity she leapt to the next branch. Kasia didn't need to get to the forest floor-at least not anymore.

These past four years she learned the forest inside and out, she could dart along branches just as fast and as easily as a squirrel could. The large trees easily making paths for humans to use as long as they were high enough. She took off running with her destination set in mind she felt like a bird at the speed that she flew through the forest at.

…

Levi was looking around him in horror though it didn't show on his face as he glanced around in the chaos, they had gone into the trees to get cover from the titans on the plains. Only to find themselves surrounded in seconds, his men were dying all around him left and right.

He flew with his usual amount of skill and accuracy freeing soldiers and slaying titans but it all seemed so pointless there were simply so many of them. He watched as a soldier he just freed and was attempting to retreat was snatched up once again and devoured mercilessly. He killed three titans in quick succession but as his feet landed down for a momentary pause, the first in all the chaos as he looked around he realised that it was pointless.

He heard a scream for help and not one to let lives be lost pointlessly Levi pushed of the branch swinging to save his comrade, only for his line to be unexpectedly snagged by a titan he hadn't seen. It was the first time in his life that Levi wasn't in focus-the first time he screwed up and as he swung directly and uncontrollably towards a tree he realised it was most likely his last time.

His eyes widened as the tree rushed up to meet him and he collided with it hard. His head hit first his skull blazing with agonizing pain, his vison doubled and blurred and over all swam. He couldn't focus or think straight. He flipped as he fell to the forest floor beneath him seeing the chaos, the trees and the last thing he saw as he collided with the ground was the bright blue sky above him.

When consciousness came back to Levi he felt himself being dragged along the forest floor, his body was sore all over and it was in so much agonizing pain the he didn't want to move. He felt the ground moving underneath as he was dragged, leaves shifting and rocks momentarily digging into him as he was dragged over them.

He felt a strong grip on his ankle and he was absolutely confused as to who-or rather what was dragging him. It couldn't have been a titan it would have killed him, he knew that much, and it was most likely not a soldier because they wouldn't be dragging him by his ankle.

He groaned and opened his eyes weakly, in his blurred and distorted sight he saw a tall figure walking slowly. It walked upright but didn't look human it was large and furry a thick matted and dirtied coat it was panting heavily and moaning as it dragged him. Levi felt a wash of terror what the hell was it that was dragging him, but he felt consciousness slip away from him unwillingly.

"Hey you- dumbass wake up." Levi heard someone say at him, his face rudely jabbed by an impatient finger. The impatient finger turned to a hand lightly slapping his cheek, "Dumbass I'm talking to you." the voice persisted it sounded somewhat feminine but unfamiliar to Levi's ears.

He groaned and opened his eyes again, it was dim wherever he was the light source was embers judging by the faded yellow and orange light. Leaning over him was a girl's face pale in the light, it was grimy and dirt covered, her hair was a rat's nest tangle with mud, twigs and leaves in it. There was something that Levi couldn't identify that was smeared across her face but it was too dark to make out.

"You awake dumbass?" she asked him.

Levi shifted his head to look into her hardened brown eyes his head still groggy, his tongue felt heavy in his mouth which he couldn't seem to get to cooperate with him, "You're the dumbass." He managed to say in a disjointed manner still unable to fully control his mouth.

"You're the ones who fired the stupid gun getting all the titans in the forest to attack, I'm the one who came in and saved your sorry butt. From my point of view you're the dumbass." She fired back at him.

"Where are we?" Levi asked trying to sit up but only managing to weakly shift his arms by his sides.

"I managed to drag you-the live ones that is… back to my cave. Though I'm not pleased to have you all here with me." The girl answered glancing away from Levi and fixating on something else, Levi supposed that it was the others she managed to drag back. As his clouded and cluttered mind thought about it, the creature dragging him must have been her.

"How many of us?" He asked her.

"Besides you there were only three others alive-but they're in rough shape-I don't think one of them will even make the night." She sighed looking tired, exhausted and helpless-she was admittedly depressed over the fact she couldn't save the life, "The rest I found were already dead-I wasn't going to risk taking them with me… I'll start on burials when I can get around to it." She sighed.

"How'd you do it? How did you go unnoticed?" Levi asked her.

She reached behind her pulling up a hood, Levi the realised that she was wearing a bear skin, the hood was once its head. With it pulled over you couldn't really tell she was human her eyes were the only things peeking out from the darkness of where her face was under the hood.

"Titans only attack humans-I don't look or smell human wearing bear skins with rabbit's blood smeared over my face." She explained, Levi scrunched his nose in disgust that must have been what was smeared over her face along with the dirt and mud.

She pulled the brown skin back down revealing that messy and un-kept hair, she glanced around some more, "What the hell were you all doing here any ways?" she asked him harshly.

"I should be the one asking that." Levi answered sitting up, in the dim light he could just make out the cave. Lying next to him on pallets constructed from branches and furs were the other three soldiers she had mentioned. The one next to him had his face entirely bandaged, despite the girl's dirty appearance the cave was neat tidy and organised, the bandages on his comrades clean and neatly tied with diligent hands. The one next to the bandaged face had his legs bound together in a makeshift brace and his arm in a donut sling around his neck. The last had lost an arm a tourniquet made out of her belt on her arm, she was panting and sweat covered among and groaning.

The embers sat in the middle of the cave, casting their warm glow on everything. Levi could see on the wall across from himself and his men an assortment of farmer's tools and homemade weapons.

"You live here?" he asked her confused.

"I have been for four years at least-ever since _they_ showed up that is." She answered quietly suddenly her eyes took a new light "Where are you-are there more of you? Where have all the people gone? Has Wall Rose fallen? Is Wall Sina at least standing-the colossal titan is it gone or is it still roaming around?" she blurted out in a rush of questions.

Levi stared at her confused, she had been living for four years by herself in the wilderness completely disconnected from the rest of the world was it even possible to do that? He tried to force himself up this time frustrated at his own weakness. All he managed was to weakly get up onto his elbows scowling in frustration.

"You mean you know nothing?" he asked her.

She blinked and looked like she wanted to pounce him for answers, "Nothing about what?" she demanded.

"Wall Rose is fine, the colossal titan hasn't been seen from since Shiganshina." Levi answered her, "People have been living in comfort behind the walls." He added.

Her mouth opened, her jaw dropping in excitement when suddenly the man with the two slings groaned, she leapt up to her feet and immediately dashed over to the man tending to him. Her face softened as she tended to him and in an unfamiliar langue- as Levi listened he determined that it may have been German.

She walked over to the embers retrieving a metal pot that was resting on it, she dug her hands in not in the least bit affected by the hot water as she withdrew soaked rags. She wiped at his face and glanced over to Levi, "I suggest you get some rest stranger, it's going to be a long night." She stated to him in English.

"It's Levi." He answered not sure if telling her that he was in the military was worth it at all or his rank.

"Night Levi." The girl replied as her eyes and hands fixated themselves on the patient in front of her, Levi felt exhausted with his battered and broken body. To his displeasure he found his eyes soon dropping and he passed out easily.

He awoke several times throughout the night to hear groans of pain and cries, pleads and begs that cut through the silence in the cave. Under the ruckus he could hear his saviour a mysterious girl who lived in a cave speaking quietly and comforting. He couldn't see her but knew that she was working her hardest. As morning drew near he heard someone softly crying.

"I'm sorry, I'm just so sorry." He heard the girl whispering softly through quiet sobs and sniffles. Levi rolled over, she was sitting next to the pallet beside him leaning over the soldier whose face was covered in bandages. She had collapsed on him embracing him tightly as she cried into his shoulder, "I tried, I tried-I'm just so sorry." She breathed before sitting up and rubbing at the corner of her eyes, "I promise you that I'll bury you alongside of my people, a nice formal burial too it's the least I can do." She promised the dead body.

Levi watched as she got to her feet unsteadily still swiping at her eyes. She circled around to the back of the pallet, pulling the hood of her bear skins up over her head. She grabbed the bottom of the pallet and began to drag it outside.

She paused to glance at Levi and he shut his eyes pretending to be asleep-his saviour was someone who was undoubtedly good and noble. Her footsteps echoed for a while longer in the cave before falling silent, Levi fell back asleep then.

He awoke unsure of how much time had passed he sat up, there was another pot sitting on the embers but it smelled delicious-she must have been making something for them all to eat. He sat up groaning n pain-he must have broken some ribs or something judging from the pain he was in. Glancing down at his abdomen he saw that he was indeed bandaged up.

He heard footsteps and glanced around, padding across the cave was an unfamiliar girl, her brown hair pulled up behind her in a tight braid wearing a white shirt and brown trousers. She was carrying a large hand woven basket with her that had green vegetation in it.

She set it down next to the embers and sat down next to them herself removing the lid from the pot and adding some of the plants to it. She glanced up feeling eyes on her, "Morning." She greeted stiffly and Levi recognized the voice-it was the girl from yesterday washed up and clean.

"Who are you?" Levi asked.

The girl snorted, "I'm the one who saved your ungrateful hide-sheesh I just washed up because it's not good to be handling the injured with dirtied hands, if you don't like it then suck it up."

She looked into the large pot again grabbing a ladle and stirring the contents around taking a deep breath, "Just like Kowalski made it." She murmured and reached beside her, Levi watched as she poured soup into five bowls.

She carried the first one over to him, "Think you can manage?" she asked him as she handed the warm bowl to him, he accepted it gratefully and she handed him a spoon, "Eat it all you're going to need your strength." She told him returning and grabbing the next bowl.

She walked over to the soldier with the slings, she shook him gently, "Hey, hey wake up. C'mon open your eyes." She whispered, the soldier stirred groaning but his eyes fluttered open nonetheless.

"That's it." She cooed, "Hey remember me?" she asked him softly, "Do you think you can sit up for me?" she prodded.

"I think so." He moaned and shifted, she set the bowl down next to her and helped him sit up as he winced and groaned in pain with every movement, "I-I think I can manage on my own thank you." The soldier insisted.

The girl nodded her head in understanding smiling at him warmly, she placed the bowl of soup in his lap near his good arm and then passed him a spoon. With shaking hands he dug the spoon into the warm liquid and with a valiant effort he weakly brought the spoon to his mouth.

"That's it there you go." The girl cooed him as he slowly ate. She shifted and got up padding over to her third patient, again she gently shook her awake, "I need you to wake up right now." Levi watched as the soldier who had lost an arm and had half their face bandaged.

The soldier was roused from her sleep whimpering in pain, the girl brushed the soldier's hair back from her face, "I know, I know it hurts. It's going to be okay-It's going to be alright." She coed as she placed her cool hand against the soldier's feverish forehead, "I've brought you some soup, good eats I promise, squirrel meat, roots heck I even found some edible mushrooms."

She brought the bowl into view of the soldier's good eye the other bandaged, she then brought it to the soldier's mouth gently tipping it to allow the warm contents to pour into her patient's mouth. Levi watched the exchange, for someone all alone she knew a lot about medical care and helping others-and why the fifth bowl when there were four of them?

But he couldn't complain she was caring to his men like they were her own family, she feed the soldier and helped put her back to rest, she glanced over at Levi, "I told you to eat that." She growled nodding her head in the direction of his soup bowl.

"For a nurse, you are quite harsh." He remarked but shifted to spoon out some of the soup obediently.

"For a patient you are quite troublesome." She retorted to him her voice still harsh, Levi wondered where her kind and soft self that had been there seconds ago had just gone.

"By the way, what's your name?" Levi asked, it had been bothering him since the beginning but he had never really gotten the chance to ask as his head seemed to be in a permanent state of swimming since his accident.

"Kasia." The girl stated coldly to him she glanced over at him her eyes hard and cold. Levi wondered for a moment if that's how he looked to his cadets He snorted in response annoyed at her, she looked over at him, "Remember you're in my house-I don't have to play nice. I'm putting myself and my people at risk right now brining you in here."

Levi felt like he had been struck by lightning though he knew it didn't show, "People?" he breathed out his fingers falling numb and the spoon slipping back into the soup.

"Yeah people you got a problem with that, what you thought there was only me?" she responded to him snatching up the fourth and fifth bowl of soup and getting to her feet.

"H-how many?" he asked unable to stop his stuttering since he was in a state of shock and disbelief.

She stood and began to walk deeper into the cave glancing over her shoulder at him, "Like I'm telling you and putting them at risk. Once you're well enough-you're all leaving." She growled seeming suddenly annoyed with him.

She stomped off leaving the Lance Corporal unexpectedly stunned he looked down at his soup and not wanting to let it go to waste began to eat it. It was the most delicious soup he had ever had he admitted to himself, it was made with a great attention to detail and care-he wondered how long exactly Kasia spent making it. He ate it all feeling stuffed but desiring more, Kasia reappeared trotting back to where she had gone to without any bowls or soup with her.

She looked over to Levi, "You done with that?" she asked him suddenly more calm and kind then she was only moments before. She walked over to him collecting the bowl, he examined it-it looked like a normal bowl. She obviously hadn't made it.

"Where'd you get the bowl?" Levi asked.

She walked back over to where the fire pit sat and dragged over a large pail Levi hadn't seen since it had been in the shadows of the cave, "This cave was a hunting camp for my family before the wall you see-that's why I can make fires in it-there's actually a hole in the ceiling to let the smoke out. My town is about a day and a half's hike from here."

"Back in the beginning we brought some things with us thinking we could go back. When we realised we couldn't I volunteered to make the trip and collected what I could and bring it back. I've done a few runs- but they're risky and I can't do them anymore I have too much to do here." She explained placing the bowl in the bucket.

She got up and trotted over to a bundle on the floor and snatched it shaking it out into the air, Levi recognized it as the bear cloak. She examined it and walked over to the weapons rack assembled on the wall retrieving a quiver and tossing it over her back then grabbing a bow. She examined it before stringing the bow, she examined the weapon once more and nodded her head in approval slipping it over her shoulder as well. She pulled the cloak on, it came down just past her knees, wearing it she barley resembled a human only her face and legs giving her away.

She crouched down and retrieved a pair of crude boots made from some sort of animal skin that Levi couldn't identify. She scratched her head and sat down shifting close the orange glowing embers. She began shifting around some of the other bowls. And Levi watched as she produced a shard of what must have once been a mirror.

She held it in one hand as she dug her fingers into the bowl, Levi watched fascinated as she rubbed the contents of the bowl over her face and then smeared it over her hands. She glanced up at him, "Do I disgust you?" she asks him coldly staring at his face coldly. He glanced away somewhat embarrassed that he had probably been looking at her disgusted, he couldn't help it-it was absolutely disgusting to be smearing God knows what it was all over her face.

"You have to do what you can to hide-like I said titans only attack humans-if you're not human they leave you alone." Kasia informed him standing up and pulling her bear hood down over her head.

"If you're not human what are you?" he asked her with his usual monotone voice-even he himself wasn't sure if he wanted to earnestly know or if he was simply mocking her.

She turned her back to him silent, "I'm whatever I need to be to survive-and I've learned that it means I can't be human. I killed that part of me long ago." And with that said she left the cave, Levi watched her go-her movements like those of a predatory animal.

He was left to his own devices. He shifted to sit up and look at his men, it was Arnold Sanders next to him with the legs and arm in braces. Arnold was still eating away at his soup which Levi though was odd-why hadn't Arnold reacted.

"Arnold." Levi said and then he realised that his voice was extremely soft and weak due to being injured, he was surprised at how Kasia managed to hear him. He cleared his throat and yelled, "Arnold." The female cadet shifted in her sleep at the sound-however, Levi couldn't tell who she was since the bandaged half of her face was the one to him.

Arnold turned, "L-Lance Corporal sir!" he blurted out embarrassedly setting his soup down and trying to salute with his good arm, "I apologize sir, my hearing is off especially in my right ear sir." He stated, Levi sighed of course it had to be the ear closest to him.

"Who is that next to you Sanders?" Levi growled.

"It's Torrence sir, she had part of half of her face severally damaged by a titan when it tried to eat her-I got injured trying to save her sir." Arnold obediently informed his senior ranking officer in a friendly tone, "That girl is very nice sir-she's been tending to all of us greatly. If it wasn't for her Torrence would've died it was her quick thinking that stopped her from bleeding out-it's the fever now."

Levi nodded his head, "Finish your meal Sanders." He ordered and leaned back against the cave behind him. It was hours before Kasia returned she was covered in mud from her feet up to her waist trailing it behind her, the bear fur matted. Tossed over her back was a rope of dead squirrels with a few birds her bow in hand.

She unstrung her bow and returned it to its place on the wall, she then ripped her hood down. Her hair was sweaty and plastered to her head or else it was frizzled and sticking out in a tangled mess. Her face was still covered in the mess she spread earlier. The mess had started to run from her sweat and Levi could see a smear of her sleeve arm most likely from her trying to wipe sweat away.

She pulled the cloak up over her head and tossed the quiver aside sighing in frustration. She threw herself down next to the fire pulling a knife out from her belt and snatching a squirrel. Levi watched in partial fascination and disgust as she skinned and cleaned the mess with expert hands. It wasn't until she set up a spit and had the squirrel on it that she washed her face clean.

She looked up at Levi and snapped, "What do you think you're looking at huh?" Levi glanced away and heard her mutter under her breath, "That's what I thought."


End file.
